Gay Culture

I have a lot of gay friends but only a few that I’m actually close to. I have friends who are closeted, in denial, out and proud. I also have friends who call themselves ‘bisexual’ but have never been with a woman nor do they seem to have any plans of being with one.

You might be wondering what my point is. You see, and this is not limited to my friends which is something that I wanna stress out, the gays I've met over the years aren't very well versed with gay culture and history. With the gays that I've met through common friends, socialized with, worked with, performed with, even dated, there are only a handful of them who are aware of our history. This actually saddens me.

Behind the glitz and glam and fabulousness of being gay, we have our own history. People who did their part so we could live freely, people who went through a lot to help lessen the discrimination and prejudice that befalls our society.

We have our gay icons, celebrities and performers who used the power and influence they have to open the minds of those who have it closed shut. These people helped usher the LGBT community into the future and though there is still hatred and prejudice in this world, the level of acceptance and understanding grows by the day.

I, however, have noticed that some of the younger gays don’t seem to have this sense of pride. Based on what I've observed, for some being gay means dressing well, religiously going to the gym as if it were church, knowing anything and everything about fashion, cruising guys at the mall or the gym, etc.

There is so much more to being gay than that.

I personally know some people who have no idea who is Patti LuPone.

Or Bernadette Peters.

Or Judy Garland.

And I’ve been asked by several people if Cher is a transsexual woman.

Pride month is celebrated  around the world.

And for some, this is what they think the Pride Parade is all about.

But do they know that this person is one the reasons why we have the Pride Parade.

For those of you who don’t know, this is Marsha P. Johnson. He was a drag queen who threw the first rock at the police who were harassing several gay men inside a bar which ignited the Stonewall Riot in New York. The Pride Parade was celebrated after that to commemorate the first time that the LGBT community fought back against their oppressors. This is also why drag queens are important attendees during Pride Fest. It was a drag queen who sparked the proverbial fire.

This is the rainbow flag used by the LGBT community.

But this was the original rainbow flag and every color had a meaning.

Pink was for sexuality, Red for life, Orange for healing, Yellow for sunlight, Green for nature, Turquoise for magic/art, Indigo for serenity/harmony and Violet for spirit.

These are random things, trivial things. But these are part of our history, our culture.

We should at least be aware that they exist.

By the way dear readers, I am in no way bashing anyone nor am I generalizing that all gays are not aware of gay culture. This is meant for those who don’t know our history and would probably want a crash course.

In the tone of Miranda Priestly, I bid you all with a, ‘That’s all.’

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Reunited!

Last week, Elaine and Bongga went to the house for a small get-together. It was great because we haven't seen each other in months.

Although, I did see Bongga the week before when I showed up at her house.

I was surprised when I saw her. As in shocked. Long hair na siya. She no longer sports the anime hair. She looks so lady-like now. Looks lang. She hasn't changed. Still the same Bongga that I love to bits.

Elaine arrived at my house first. Isa ring long hair ulit.  She came bearing gifts. A bucket of fried chicken from KFC :)

Bongga was still at the office so susunod nalang daw siya.

When Elaine arrived, nagumpisa na ang kwentuhan. Naglabas siya agad ng kanyang mga hinanaing tungkol sa kanyang boyfriend. Ang sabi ko sa kanya, pagdating ni Bongga eh magpupustahan kami kung ilang days, weeks or months pa sila magtatagal.

Nagtxt si Bongga at sinabing nasa village na daw siya so sinundo ko siya sa gate. Pagdating namin sa bahay, kumain muna kami dahil pare-pareho kaming gutom. Umpisa ulit ng kwentuhan. Buhay nila sa kanilang mga bagong trabaho, at buhay ko sa office.

Pagkatapos kumain, pumunta kami sa dirty kitchen ng aking bahay para dun magyosi. Sabi ko kay Elaine, magkwento na siya tungkol sa boyfriend niya. Ang loka loka naman nagkwento.

Tuminging bigla sa akin si Bongga.

"Ilang linggo ang pusta mo?" tanong niya.

Tumawa si Elaine at sinabi na kanina ko pa daw sinasabi na magpupustahan kami ni Bongga pagdating niya.

"Oo nga!" sagot ko.

"Napakabait niyong mga kaibigan ah!" sabi ni Elaine.

They left the house at around 1:30AM.

We actually had one more person over but I don't know if I'm allowed to put it here so wag muna. Baka may magalit eh.

I had so much fun with them. I remember when we were all still at the office. Smoking and gossiping haha.

Now Elaine works at Teleperformance and Bongga works at VXI. I, on the other hand, am still with the same company.

When people don't see each other for a long time, sometimes there's this awkwardness or animosity among them. We didn't have that. We picked up where we left off. It's as if we just saw each other days before. Bongga and Elaine are some of the VERY FEW that I can call friends.

We haven't seen each other for a long time. We got reunited... and boy did it feel so good :)


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Ocean Park

A few weeks ago, Gregory and I had one lazy weekend so we decided to go out. Not knowing where to go, I suggested we go to Manila Ocean Park since I haven't been there in a long time.

We got there at around 4PM. The line wasn't that bad. We wanted to watch the sea lion show which was starting in an hour so decided to walk around first to kill time.

The sea lion show started at around 5 and there a lot of people. We got pretty good seats.

I enjoyed this show. The seals were really entertaining.

The Musical Fountain Show was at 7:15 so we walked around Ocean Park. I smoked every now and then of course.

Here are the Jelly Fish. Nothing earth-shattering.

After spending time with the Jelly Fish and walking around, we finally went to the Musical Fountain. We were in line for about 20 minutes. Ang daming tao.

Then it started.

I actually took about 80 pictures of the show but I don't think posting 80 pictures in one post would be a good idea.

The Musical Fountain ended at around 8pm so we went straight to the Oceanarium which by the way, is my favorite place in Manila Ocean Park.

I'm so happy. Can you tell? :)

I walked around finding Dory (Ha!) but I couldn't see her anywhere so I had to settle for Nemo.

Outside the tunnel. I've always wanted to dive into this tank and just swim the fishes. Although the presence of sharks and manatees bigger than me kinda scares me a bit.

Oh and since we were at the souvenir shop while we were roaming, we bought matching shirts. I kinda wanted this shirt. I find it fabulous. I don't have good taste in clothes, I know.

We ended up buying this shirt. Syempre ako lang ang nasa picture.

It was a fun day. Gregory and I always go to malls or cinemas when we go out so doing something different and on a whim was fun.

I told him that I wanna go to Enchanted Kingdom next time.

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I Got Love!

A year ago, I was a single gay man living in Metro Manila. I had a regular job, paid taxes, went on dates every now and then. It was fun and all, but I knew that there was something missing. Somehow, all the partying and enjoying my singleness just didn't cut it.

Eventually, I met this guy. It was a Friday. 

We went out on one date, and how I could I have ever possibly known that one year later, we'd still be together.

I still remember the first time I saw him. He was wearing a blue long-sleeved shirt and jeans. He walked with such confidence, but I did not find it arrogant at all. The first hour was awkward, we were shifting between topics trying to find something we had in common.

Like any other date, we had dinner, it was at Cyma and watched a movie. It was Mirror Mirror starring Julia Roberts and Lily Collins. 

Before I knew it, the movie was over and we were walking around Eastwood. It was 2AM when I realized the time and remembered that I had work in the morning. He drove me home. I woke up the next day and he was beside me.

Do not judge me.

He took me to work but we had breakfast at McDonalds first.

The day flew by with me feeling ecstasy. I was still relieving what had happened the night before. I got home and started preparing dinner. My doorbell rang. It was him. 

"What are you doing here?", I asked.

"Just enjoying the moment.", he answered.

The rest, as they say, is history.

* * * * 

Gregory, my love, today may not be our Anniversary of being a couple, but today marks the day when I met you. Who'd have thought that in the blink of an eye, you would turn my world upside down.

The past year has been crazy and so amazing, it flew by so fast. I barely noticed it. When I'm with you, everything just seems so much better. There's are times when I still find myself wondering what the hell did I do to get a guy such as you.

I have been hurt in the past but that never stopped me from finding love and then you came along. With you I feel safe and secure. You filled all the things that were missing in my life and now I feel complete.

With you in my life, I no longer look back at the man that I was. I look forward to the man I want to be. Like what you always tell me, we will never know what the future holds which is why we always enjoy the moment, but I am confident that this is the real thing.

It may have taken you 10 years to find me, and it may have took me several jerks and assholes before finding you, but it was worth it because when I look at you, I know that it was worth the wait.

I am your first and I want you to be my last.

Happy Anniversary Gregory.

I love you.

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Memoirs, Light The Corners of my Mind

I don't know why but for several months now, I have had this crazy obsession with reading memoirs. Although, I am picky about the one's I read. As you can see from the photo above, I mostly prefer funny ones or memoirs which I can learn a lot of stuff from.

I love reading books, fiction is my preferred genre, but there's something about memoirs that just strikes my interest. These are stories of people I admire or love and I find it exciting when I get to read about their life. I could do it online, I could just type their name in Google and find pages upon pages of stuff about them. But these are mostly rumors or gossip.

Memoirs give me an idea of what they've been through from their point of view. I get to read their side of the story. It gives me a glimpse of their life and that despite the glitz and glam of hollywood, they are just normal people with extraordinary talents that brought them to where they are.

I've also learned several lessons from their life experiences and though all of them had different roads to take, they all have one message in common to their readers.

It's that, there are times when you will fall down, face flat on the ground, but force yourself to get up, stand up and then stand out.

"Even when I was down, I treated myself as a star until eventually, the rest of the world caught on."
-RuPaul Charles Tweet

Na-Wrong Send Ako

Isang araw ay kausap ko sa Skype ang isa sa mga manager dito sa office.

May mga dapat kasi kaming gawin that day at medyo tambak kami ng trabaho.

Ang isa sa officemates ko, itago natin siya sa pangalang Marcel, ay todo reklamo at todo react. Kesyo kelangan daw niyang umuwi, ayaw daw niyang mag overtime, keme keme and all that shit.

So kalagitnaan ng usapan namin ni manager, pero ka chat ko din si Marcel sa Skpy dahil may tinatanong siya sa akin about something.

Type... type... tuloy ang usapan...

Pinaguusapan namin ni manager si Marcel.

"I dont know what Marcel is complaining about. Marcel is nice and all but sometimes he can be annoying as hell!", tinype ko.

Click ang Enter key.

Nagsend ang message.

"Bakit mo sa akin to sinabi?", biglang reply.

Pagtingin ko sa pangalan, Marcel ang nakasulat.

Nanlamig ang buong katawan ko.

"Oh shit!", sabi ko sa sarili ko.

Kay Marcel ko nasend yung message. Award!

Tumingin ako kay Marcel. Nakatingin siya sa PC niya. Mukhang naghihintay sa kung ano ba ang isasagot ko dun.

"Kasi reklamo ka ng reklamo. I know where you're coming from pero nasabihan tayong lahat na magstay muna dito habang tinatapos yung update. Message ko yan kay manager. Para alam mo narin kung ano yung sinabi ko sa kanya.", reply ko.

Eh nahuli na ako eh. Alangan naman magsinungaling ako.

Pinanindigan ko na.

"So now I know I am annoying" reply ni Marcel sa akin.

"Yes you are." I replied. "But like I said, you're nice naman. It's just those moments when you become more annoying than usual." I added.

He explained kung bakit siya nagrereklamo. Masakit daw tiyan niya.

Mmkay... sabi niya eh. I still cannot see the connection up to this day. Pero sige nalang.

Lesson learned: tignang mabuti kung kanino sinesend ang messages sa Skype. O kaya wag ako masyadong mataray. I prefer the first one :)

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Crazy Katsu

As I mentioned in my last blog post, nung Valentines day eh pumunta kami ni Gregory sa Crazy Katsu.

We went to several places before ending up here.

Kamusta naman, super dami ng mga tao at puno lahat ng mga restaurant. Muntik pa akong mang away ng tao dahil shushunga shunga siya.

Anyway, the food was okay.

The thing is, I thought this place would serve a huge variety of Japanese food. Hindi pala.

They didn't have sushi which or tempura. It would have been perfect na sana.

If you guys wanna try it, it's in Maginhawa street, a block of two away from Serenitea. :)

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Valentines Day

Valentines day comes but once a year, they say.

Its the time of the year when love is in the air. Roses, chocolates, stuffed toys everywhere and I find it weird that people celebrate love only once a year.

Gregory and I didn't have a big celebration or anything. For one, every restaurant we went to was either fully booked or jam packed. We ended up eating in a place called Crazy Katsu which is located in Maginhawa Street.

For me, all that matters was that I was with him. It was just like any other date night we had.

I didn't really need chocolates or gifts or anything to remind me that it was a special day. I don't see things that way. Every time I'm with him, it's special.

While driving around Maginhawa looking for a place to eat, I saw couples everywhere and most of them were carrying flowers, bears, chocolates, or all of the above.

In my mind I'm thinking, 'Really? It's only today that you make your partner feel special or loved?'.

A friend of mine once asked me, 'Since you and Gregory have been dating for almost a year, do you still feel happy and in love everyday?'

My answer was simple but honest.

'Not all-day-everyday. But yeah, everyday.'

Very Charlotte from Sex and the City.

But that's what I feel. Gregory and I have our little arguments and spats but it's nothing we can't sit down and talk about.

I don't need one day of the year to remind him that I love him.

I have 365 days to do that.

I don't have to wait every 14th of February to tell or show him how much he means to me.

I can do that everyday.

Others wait for a year to celebrate their love.

Others wait for a year to surprise or give gifts to their significant other.

I don't.

Because having Gregory in my life, everyday becomes Valentines day :)

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Memories

I was going through some photo albums on Facebook.

They weren't even mine.

Most of them were from people who were on my friends list and some who were not but since they were gracious enough not to lock down the security on their pages, their albums were on display for the world to see.

I was reminded of the past. Some of these people, I am still friends with but most of them, I'm not.

These were people who became a big part of my life but ended up hurting me.These are people I called friends but in the end, I felt like I was bamboozled by these people who I trusted.

With everything that's going on in my life, some things are moving too fast and going through those photos, I was reminded of a time when things were much more simple for me. A time when I only had to worry about trivial things.

Those photos reminded me of the things I had to do to become who I am today. I had to learn how to numb myself and put up a wall.

I admit, it came to a point when I wished harm to fall upon them.

Because of these people, I learned the importance of indifference.

And in a world where you are surrounded by people who could potentially use you for their own personal gain, indifference is worse than hate.

At this point, I consider them as fragments of a past I no longer cling to. But every now and then, the past comes back and knocks on my door to remind me of who I was before, who I am now and who I plan to be in the future.

And now as I reminisce the past, I ask myself, of everything I did to be who I am now, do I regret anything?

The answer is, no.

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Monthsarry Dinner

Gregory and I celebrated our monthsarry a few days ago. I don't really blog about our monthsarries but this time I felt the need to.

I told him to leave work early because I'll prepare dinner at home.

I made my Basil Tuna Mushroom pasta which he seems to love so much.

He bought a cake from Conti's which was actually really good. He said that he wanted to get Sansrival because it's my favorite cake but he couldn't find any so he got me the next best thing, chocolate.

So there we were in the dining area having dinner when I saw a brown baggie at the end of the table bear the cake. I asked him what it was.

"Secret. That's for later." he answered.

After dinner, he opened the brown paper bag and inside it was a scrapbook.

He said that he made this back in December and was planning to give it to me as a Christmas gift but he ended up buying me an iPad case.

It's so cute. Apparently, I'm the one with spiky hair.

For obvious reasons I could not yet show what's inside it but it's filled with pictures of us. Most of them from our trips. Some of the pictures, I didn't even know existed. It was my first time seeing them.

I was surprised and touched. No one has ever made me a scrapbook. The time and effort he put in to make this just makes my heart melt.

Gregory, thank you so much for the gift, I love it.

The small things you do make me love you more and you never cease to find ways to take my breath away.

I love you so much, my bunny :)

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